Filthy Rich: All that's wrong with America

For Brat Camp 2, let's ship off all the spoiled young scions currently whining their way through Filthy Rich: Cattle Drive (E!). What a bunch of spoiled little pussies.

The premise is the old fish-out-of-water trick. They've taken a bunch of Beverly Hills 20-somethings and plonked them onto a Colorado cattle ranch. They're supposed to go on a cattle drive from one place to another, camping in teepees along the way. These kids on horseback look like those circus bears riding bicycles around the center ring. It just looks so wrong.

Among the rich brats: some oily club kid named Fabian Basabe; Alex Quinn, one of Anthony's 12 spawn; Brittny Gastineau, on a break from that creepy reality show in which she and her mom both hit on the same guys; Noah Blake, Robert's son, who keeps saying "We'll murder you!" to the other team; Courtenay Semel, daughter of the Yahoo! CEO; Shanna Ferrigno, the Hulk's kid; and Kourtney Kardashian, daughter of the only defense lawyer at the O.J. trial who registered shock at the not guilty verdict. Maybe a few others who don't get much screen time because they're even more boring than this other bunch.

Ms. Semel was seen dialing up daddy on her cell and begging him to "call the network or something" because the ranch experience was "too abnormally hard."

That description might also apply to the young Mr. Quinn, who can be seen hitting on Semel, Gastineau and Basabe. I think this kid was one of the offspring Anthony forgot to include in his will. So he's looking for the on-ramp to easy street, even if that means exploring both genders of ramp.

Kill Reality is wonderful in that horrible reality TV whores-that-score way. More about that one later.

Oh, my lord! I just heard Billy Bush of Access Hollywood call himself a journalist. That's like Tara Reid calling herself a diplomat because she hosts a travel show.